Ingredients for Comfort and Joy
A curated list of my recent favourite things
We have recently been talking about poems of joyful accumulation—poems that begin with some small affection, which leads to a sort of snowballing of pleasure, of happy revelation, even if the revelation begins with a slight ache, a memory of someone who is no longer here, or a place that is not what it once was. […]We are also reading Aracelis Girmay’s “You Are Who I Love,” in which the speaker unfurls a list of people they love, people they want to see survive, people doing what those not committed to close and tender attention might call the daily tasks of living: a person stirring a pot of beans, a person selling roses out of a cart, a person crossing a border, a person carrying their brother home, a person singing Leonard Cohen to the snow. You, reader, do not personally know these people, but their motivations spark a familiar feeling—here is someone trying to survive in a world that can render a person unable to get out of bed. You, too, may love a person who cannot get out of bed, which is why you cherish the things that convey, I am trying to stitch together enough small moments to have a life for a little bit longer.~ In Defense of Despair, Hanif Abdurraqib, The New Yorker, May 16 2025
Despite it being several months now since my trip to the UK last fall, I still think about the night I spent during that trip at the restaurant Dishoom. I was alone, it was a cold and dark evening, and the restaurant was a hub of activity. Every table was full, the menu was on newsprint, the booths were a bright lime, the tablecloth was a forest green and white gingham pattern, and my biryani came in a tiny black clay oven. The restaurant felt reminiscent of a railway station with black and white photos, old clocks and deep cherry wood lining the walls. Every dish I ordered felt like a spiritual experience. It was a comforting and thrilling night, and I left feeling well taken care of.
Caregiving is teaching me that I like cooking for others. Separate from idealized notions of femininity, I enjoy making and sharing food as a way to express love, care, hope for another’s wellbeing and comfort through hard times. The past several weeks have been exceptionally hard on a personal and global news front, and I find myself gravitating to ease where I can find it - from foods that melt in my mouth, to places that are easy to get to, anything that offers relief, resiliency, hope and comfort with little effort. In that spirit, I spent several hours today making slow cooked daal makhani from the Dishoom cookbook. The preamble to the recipe described it as a five hour project, but it was a holiday Monday with no medical appointments scheduled, and so I had time. As I stirred and watched my daal become creamy, I thought about some of the other things that have offered me joy recently. This newsletter is a collection of some of these favourite things.
My Favourite Things Recently
To Watch
Miss Austen (Available on BBC iPlayer or as a Britbox trial on Prime Video): This four episode limited series is brilliant. It delves into the real-life mystery of why Jane Austen’s sister Cassandra burned the majority of Jane Austen’s letters after her death, leaving just a small sample left for others to read. The series follows the lives of Jane Austen, her sister Cassandra, their best friend Eliza and her sister Mary, who becomes the Austen’s sister in law (played by the brilliant Jessica Hynes of W1A and Twenty-Twelve). The series begins at the death of Eliza’s husband, when Cassandra comes to help daughter Isabella (played by Rose Leslie of The Good Fight and Downton Abbey) sort out the house she lived in with her father and vacate it so that the next male relative can take occupancy. As Cassandra helps Isabella sort the house and figure out where she is going to live next, she searches for her sister’s letters. As she reads, the show goes back in time to a time when Eliza and Jane Austen were alive and they were all trying to chart a course forward out of the poverty of their family and their resulting limited prospects. The show is subtle and very very funny, and a thoroughly enjoyable watch.
Avoidance Season 1 and 2 (Streaming on CBC Gem): A BBC1 comedy written by and starring comedian Romesh Ranganathan, Avoidance is about Jonathan, a forty-year old man who is struggling to accept that his partner Claire is breaking up with him. They aren’t married so they aren’t getting divorced, but they have a nine year old son named Spencer. Jonathan hates conflict (he’d rather eat the wrong order at his local cafe every day than raise an issue) and so breaking up is far beyond his comfort zone. In an effort to avoid conflict, he runs away to his sister’s house and moves in. The show follows Jonathan journey to be more assertive, to accept his break up, and to be more of a role model to his son and is a delightful watch.
The Ballad of Wallis Island (in theatres now). I watched this movie solo with only three other people in the theatre watching alongside me and I am here to tell you that this film is the perfect spring film. The story revolves around a musician who has been invited by an millionaire on a remote island to play a private concert. It is only when he arrives that he realises that the concert is to an audience of one and includes his previous bandmate (played by Carey Mulligan) who he hasn’t seen in nearly ten years. The result is an awkward and funny story and I absolutely loved it.
Superboys of Malegaon (Prime Video): This 2024 film is a fictionalized version of a real-life story, the story of self-taught filmmaker Nasir Shaikh in Malegaon, India who makes films with his friends shot in their local community, for their community. It’s an extraordinary, moving film about the power of art, about seeing your stories being validated and told, about friendship, about growing up, and it brought tears to my eyes more than once. I already want to see it again.
The Encampments (2025): This powerful documentary tells the story of the student protests and encampments at Columbia University, how that original encampment began, and how that protest spread to universities across North America. It is a story of resilience, state violence and student leadership.
To Read
The Knot of My Tongue: Poems and Prose by Zehra Naqvi (2024): This captivating poetry collection has poems about the strength of women, about faith, about the beauty of God vs patriarchal narratives, about Karachi, about solitude, about so much more. Did it bring tears to my eyes more than once? Yes. Did it make me laugh and smile? Yes too. I read this with my Mum and we both loved this collection and bought extra copies for friends.